How long have you been doing what you do, and how did you become a Certified Spiritual Mindset Coach?
To answer this question, it’s probably best that I share with you a defining moment, and a resulting “Compelling Story”, that brought me to where I am today – coaching people like you on exactly how to heal your soul and go from pain to power! That defining moment in my life happened in the Fall of 2017.
I’ve accomplished a lot in my life, but I’ve also carried a lot of trauma and pain that was deeply rooted all the way from my childhood. My mother had me when she was 17 years old. My father was a great father (from what I’ve always been told) but I never got to know him. He was murdered when I was 2 years old. My mother was a young teen girl with a fatherless child, trying to find her way through broken generational curses of trauma and pain. Talk about a lot of resentment and abandonment pain....I harbored a lot of it at a very young age.
Fast forward, I was raised in a very religious family. It was sometimes very confusing because it was a lot of hypocrisy and condemnation. I can’t say I didn’t have fun and memorable times with my family, but I always felt this hole in my soul. I am the oldest of 3 children (I have two brothers) and it was one of those childhoods where we were taught, “What goes on in this house stays in this house!” (The sweeping under the RUG SYNDROME). My brothers and I witnessed physical and verbal abuse early on in the home growing up. That was painful too because it was bottled up trauma. I experienced many days wishing to know my father and asking him why he left me. I would often times envision just having him around to teach me, love me, play with me and just be a shoulder to cry on. Trying to balance or understand my emotions wasn't easy!
I’ve accomplished a lot in my life, but I’ve also carried a lot of trauma and pain that was deeply rooted all the way from my childhood. My mother had me when she was 17 years old. My father was a great father (from what I’ve always been told) but I never got to know him. He was murdered when I was 2 years old. My mother was a young teen girl with a fatherless child, trying to find her way through broken generational curses of trauma and pain. Talk about a lot of resentment and abandonment pain....I harbored a lot of it at a very young age.
Fast forward, I was raised in a very religious family. It was sometimes very confusing because it was a lot of hypocrisy and condemnation. I can’t say I didn’t have fun and memorable times with my family, but I always felt this hole in my soul. I am the oldest of 3 children (I have two brothers) and it was one of those childhoods where we were taught, “What goes on in this house stays in this house!” (The sweeping under the RUG SYNDROME). My brothers and I witnessed physical and verbal abuse early on in the home growing up. That was painful too because it was bottled up trauma. I experienced many days wishing to know my father and asking him why he left me. I would often times envision just having him around to teach me, love me, play with me and just be a shoulder to cry on. Trying to balance or understand my emotions wasn't easy!
I had some really dark and fucked up days that I didn’t allow anyone else in on. I was attracted to women and it terrified me because I didn’t feel that was right by “God” and for so many days I walked around scared shitless that something would happen to me because of my religious upbringing. The more I fought the attraction for women and tried to cover up the feelings, the stronger it got. I remember trying to hide it my last couple of years of high school. I was miserable. I was one of the star basketball players at my high school and pretty popular (this was my outlet from shame). I felt like I was being one way at school, but lied about who I was when I was around my family. The inner battle was mad real for me at this time!
All the trauma and shit I watched growing up had me physically fighting with females and just attracting all kinds of negative things. I remember writing my mother a letter back in 2003-04 while I was in about my third year in college and telling her I was a lesbian. It was never easy talking to her (our relationship has always been surfaced). She never even talked about the pain we watched her endure growing up. She naturally put on a face of "All is well"and indulged herself into the rules and condemnation of religion which to me, ultimately divided our spirits even more! This led to her refusing to believe the letter I wrote her and never accepting/acknowledging me for who I wanted to be.
I started to act out and just felt unloved. So many days and nights I felt alone even if I had people around me. I, at one point in my life allowed myself to fall victim to deceitful people who used me and took my kindness for weakness. I got into some trouble while in college in 2005, got kicked out of college and had to move back home which eventually led me to wandering the streets because of the condemnation I experienced being at home. I was forced to go to a very small, condemning church, act as though I wasn’t a lesbian, dress in women attire and just pretend to be happy in a life I was miserable in just so that my mother wouldn’t look a certain way. Depression impacted me at a point of my life and some days I questioned my existence. There were a couple of times I would ask some of my guy friends (at the time) to go to family functions with me as my date even though they clearly knew I was dating women. My suicidal feelings got stronger the more I felt unaccepted.
All the trauma and shit I watched growing up had me physically fighting with females and just attracting all kinds of negative things. I remember writing my mother a letter back in 2003-04 while I was in about my third year in college and telling her I was a lesbian. It was never easy talking to her (our relationship has always been surfaced). She never even talked about the pain we watched her endure growing up. She naturally put on a face of "All is well"and indulged herself into the rules and condemnation of religion which to me, ultimately divided our spirits even more! This led to her refusing to believe the letter I wrote her and never accepting/acknowledging me for who I wanted to be.
I started to act out and just felt unloved. So many days and nights I felt alone even if I had people around me. I, at one point in my life allowed myself to fall victim to deceitful people who used me and took my kindness for weakness. I got into some trouble while in college in 2005, got kicked out of college and had to move back home which eventually led me to wandering the streets because of the condemnation I experienced being at home. I was forced to go to a very small, condemning church, act as though I wasn’t a lesbian, dress in women attire and just pretend to be happy in a life I was miserable in just so that my mother wouldn’t look a certain way. Depression impacted me at a point of my life and some days I questioned my existence. There were a couple of times I would ask some of my guy friends (at the time) to go to family functions with me as my date even though they clearly knew I was dating women. My suicidal feelings got stronger the more I felt unaccepted.
I always believed in hope and me being something greater. I was like a nomad at one point, sleeping from couch to couch and sometimes in my car if I had to. I cried many nights, I drank to cope and I started smoking weed heavily to cope with the pain. It was hard going around my family at one point. I had so many insecurities because someone was always pointing out how I would get out of this phase and get married to a man and have children. It was miserable not being able to just fully be accepted for me.
My life started to shift when I enrolled at the University of Texas at Arlington in 2006. I got connected with an Academic Advisor in the Social Work department. She really cared about my story and she helped me create a plan for myself. This excited me because through all the bullshit I had gone through, I’d managed to uplift or be there for others, which came around for me at a pivotal point in my life! I was able to get a school apartment, get my first “real” job at the Boys and Girls Club, later graduate in 2009 with my undergraduate degree and move into a career working for Child Protective Services in 2010. I started to have tiny breakthroughs in my soul, but first let me give you a better understanding of how this healing unfolded. It was 2009, and I attempted to end my life!
I didn't talk to anyone about my deep pain because I was so ashamed to be viewed as someone so broken. I felt like people would judge me. I remember taking a lot of pain killers and drinking down a 5th, one of those small but potent bottles of vodka hoping that it would really just put me into a sleep I wouldn't have to wake up from. I was never a drinker like that, but hey...I just lost all hope that night. When I woke up the next day with a really bad hangover, I realized there was a reason I woke up. I questioned God at that time because I just couldn't understand why a God that I was told was so loving..could allow so many fucked up things to happen. Literally, as I sat there with a bad ass headache, I heard this message say..."Go get help!" I didn't know it then, but angels were speaking to me. I started my journey towards therapy and healing and I didn't look back.
I felt better about things and the sense of independence I was gaining, but I still felt fucked up inside many days. I was breaking through layers and limitations as I went along. It wasn't the easiest process and whoever tells you healing is easy...Is being very inauthentic with you. I later met my life partner and meeting her definitely changed my life because she empowered me in so many ways. We were both broken in ways only the other could piece together with committed inner work. I was cracking open more of me and shit started to really get real and in an odd way clearer. I furthered my education and got my Master’s degree in Psychology in 2013. I started to align myself with the life I desired by focusing on me for once and what I really wanted in life. That was everything for me. It was like I could see light after all that darkness!
I started to see people for who they really were and I ended toxic friendships/relationships that held me down for many years. I started to discover my truth, speak it and step into more of my power. In 2016, after 6 years with Child Protective Services, I decided to resign. My soul was tired and ready to transform. I remember taking about 4 months off just to replenish mentally, physically and emotionally. I remember feeling so depleted helping others deal with or overcome trauma when I hadn't fully dealt with mine!
I started working for this small company that provided services for individuals with mental health disabilities in the fall of 2016. That only lasted a year because I started to notice an unethical pattern from my last job and how negatively depleting the culture was. At this point, I knew that I had to change up internally and heal a lot of deeply rooted things or else I would just keep attracting the same negative experiences. I got this strong intuitive tug one day that spoke to me from me. I could sense a big change coming even though I didn't understand it all at the time.
Fall 2017 (Right before my birthday in November), I took a leap of faith. I let go of everything and anyone that no longer served me and I completely took a dive within my soul. I knew it wasn’t going to be pretty, but I was tired and I was ready to be free. The very first thing I knew I had to do was face that reflection in the mirror. I faced it, I cried, and when I say cried I let it all out and it felt like years of built up tears flowing uncontrollably! I apologized to myself and that inner girl in me and I decided in that moment to speak life to myself, discover myself and love myself unconditionally. Self Love really is A Dope Ass Vibe!
Loving myself was the best damn decision I’ve made for myself. I went through the storm of growth and I came out empowered and ready to live! I turned insecurities into certainties, abandonment into wholeness and limited old beliefs into positive affirmations. I wrote letters of forgiveness to the ones I felt I needed to let go of which shed so much weight off my shoulders. The letter of final release was the one I wrote to my mother. I wanted her to feel all of my pain but to also feel compassion from me at the same time. Through that healing journey I learned that she couldn’t possibly give me something she didn’t have. By doing that, I released all the trauma that haunted me pretty much all my life. Here I am today, living a positively fulfilled life I am creating simply because I made a choice to let go of what no longer served me and re-write my story! Oh, and what a powerfully resilient story it is...
Loving myself was the best damn decision I’ve made for myself. I went through the storm of growth and I came out empowered and ready to live! I turned insecurities into certainties, abandonment into wholeness and limited old beliefs into positive affirmations. I wrote letters of forgiveness to the ones I felt I needed to let go of which shed so much weight off my shoulders. The letter of final release was the one I wrote to my mother. I wanted her to feel all of my pain but to also feel compassion from me at the same time. Through that healing journey I learned that she couldn’t possibly give me something she didn’t have. By doing that, I released all the trauma that haunted me pretty much all my life. Here I am today, living a positively fulfilled life I am creating simply because I made a choice to let go of what no longer served me and re-write my story! Oh, and what a powerfully resilient story it is...
I cleaned up my past and started teaching other women (and some men), how they can do the same, especially those the LGBTQ community. I’ve watched their healing unfold to pure happiness! I have since made a commitment to dedicate the rest of my professional and personal life to helping others who are ready to heal past pain/trauma, be who they authentically are and truly LOVE THEMSELVES. Working with me, you are guaranteed to clear negative blockages, step into your true self and be all you desire to be all while living your best life. You will connect with inner peace in unimaginable ways!
Since then, I’ve worked with many private clients, spoken in front of countless groups: I live my dream of having the freedom I desire working for myself, making great money doing what I love, traveling the world, giving back to the community, inspiring others to self love and feeling an inner peace I will never let go of. This in turn, has elevated all relationships around me including my marriage and more positive connections with family and friends. I have a soul family now, and that shit right there is LOVE!
This led me to creating the Dee'Tox Signature System™ , a series of 8 important inner and outer steps that will guide you towards healing which will then lead you towards happiness and inner peace! When you have happiness and inner peace, you look at life with certainty! You know that anything you ever wanted to do is yours and you’ll do that and you’ll love your life more and more each day!
I cleaned up my past and started teaching other women (and some men), how they can do the same, especially those the LGBTQ community. I’ve watched their healing unfold to pure happiness! I have since made a commitment to dedicate the rest of my professional and personal life to helping others who are ready to heal past pain/trauma, be who they authentically are and truly LOVE THEMSELVES. Working with me, you are guaranteed to clear negative blockages, step into your true self and be all you desire to be all while living your best life. You will connect with inner peace in unimaginable ways!
Since then, I’ve worked with many private clients, spoken in front of countless groups: I live my dream of having the freedom I desire working for myself, making great money doing what I love, traveling the world, giving back to the community, inspiring others to self love and feeling an inner peace I will never let go of. This in turn, has elevated all relationships around me including my marriage and more positive connections with family and friends. I have a soul family now, and that shit right there is LOVE!
This led me to creating the Dee'Tox Signature System™ , a series of 8 important inner and outer steps that will guide you towards healing which will then lead you towards happiness and inner peace! When you have happiness and inner peace, you look at life with certainty! You know that anything you ever wanted to do is yours and you’ll do that and you’ll love your life more and more each day!
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS...
Who are your clients?
I work with people just like you who are ready to do the inner work and positively transform their lives!
My ideal clients typically:
My ideal clients typically:
- Are ready to take their lives to the next level through action
- Are committed to doing the inner work towards healing and self-discovery
- Are ready to clear negative blockages and tap into a more positive, happy life
- Value high integrity and respect through accountability
- Are ready to turn pain into purpose and soar to new levels
- Know their lives have purpose and are ready to tap into their higher self
What Makes You Different from Other Life Coaches?
I understand being at the place where you are now. I was anxiously ready to turn pain into purpose. I've experienced the unhappy side before healing. Through my life's experiences and spiritual aspects, I can help you transform from the inside without the limited beliefs, the conditional love or judgement. I am organic and I will help you shift your energy and mindset to a more positive outlook with so much clarity. I'll be like a soul friend you never knew you had, but always wanted! Most importantly, I'll help you love yourself and meet someone that's been excited to meet you.....You!
I care about you healing into happiness. Things will get real and it will not always be pretty, but it will be worth it. I'll be honest with you and help you clear old paths and blockages which will ultimately lead to success. My healthy dose of humor and inspiration will make the ride more enjoyable and memorable. Peace and happiness will be the new thing in your life. You and Hapiness, Ya'll belong together!
I care about you healing into happiness. Things will get real and it will not always be pretty, but it will be worth it. I'll be honest with you and help you clear old paths and blockages which will ultimately lead to success. My healthy dose of humor and inspiration will make the ride more enjoyable and memorable. Peace and happiness will be the new thing in your life. You and Hapiness, Ya'll belong together!
What type of personality do you work best with and what is expected of me?
The Dee'Tox Signature System™, workshops, products, and programs were created for people just like you who are absolutely excited and dead serious about living a positively fulfilled life! We will change those negative thoughts and create a way of thinking that will enhance every area of your life. This was designed to help you heal into a happy, fulfilled life. It's time you feel pure happiness!
Being a person that is committed, ethical, and on a spiritual journey of self-discovery, I tend to work best with other people that are on a spiritual journey of self-discovery, commitment, and ethical alignment. This includes those that are committed to their success no matter what and are super-ready to get going! My clients usually tell me, "Just tell me what to do! And I'll do it!" As long as you are ready to take serious and consistent action towards doing the inner work, you will see your life shift positively! NO excuses anymore! I'll offer you a new way of thinking and full support as you achieve this very exciting goal of pure happiness.
Being a person that is committed, ethical, and on a spiritual journey of self-discovery, I tend to work best with other people that are on a spiritual journey of self-discovery, commitment, and ethical alignment. This includes those that are committed to their success no matter what and are super-ready to get going! My clients usually tell me, "Just tell me what to do! And I'll do it!" As long as you are ready to take serious and consistent action towards doing the inner work, you will see your life shift positively! NO excuses anymore! I'll offer you a new way of thinking and full support as you achieve this very exciting goal of pure happiness.
For what type of professionals are your programs NOT going to work for?
Please know I’m very selective in who I work with and I cherry-pick my clients, choosing to (gently) turn away people who aren’t suited for my programs and won’t get the results for which they would have signed up for. That wouldn't be fair.
The Dee'Tox Signature System™ programs are NOT for those who have no money coming in and are absolutely, financially desperate, at least not right away. It’s been my experience that people in financial crisis do not trust the recommendations I give them and do not do the inner work effectively (probably because they spend so much time worrying about where they are going to get next month’s rent check or mortgage payment.) If you fall within this category, it’s absolutely OK. We’ve all been in times of financial crisis at one point or another. Do yourself (3) favors:
1. Start focusing on your desires and how you can attract what you want from your beliefs. Remember, positive affirmations spoken come to life when you FEEL GOOD!
2. Follow me on Social media for Daily Inspiration and Support! (Social Media)
The free positive mindset support will get you started towards your healing until you’re ready to work with me one-on-one.
3. Make a point to read my Journals! They will offer tips and guidance towards touchy, relatable topics followed up with encouragement!
Doing these three things will really help you get primed for our work. When you’re ready, call me and we’ll get you started. (I’m in no rush and will be here when you need me.) There are other types of personalities I absolutely won't work with. The whiner, the chronic skeptic, or individuals who consistently make excuses for not doing the work needed to see the results desired. If you are one of these people, I gently and respectfully ask that you not reach out until you are ready. Alignment is key and I want us both to feel connected. That's fair for all of us right?! I'm after success stories and committing to your growth means you are READY!!
The Dee'Tox Signature System™ programs are NOT for those who have no money coming in and are absolutely, financially desperate, at least not right away. It’s been my experience that people in financial crisis do not trust the recommendations I give them and do not do the inner work effectively (probably because they spend so much time worrying about where they are going to get next month’s rent check or mortgage payment.) If you fall within this category, it’s absolutely OK. We’ve all been in times of financial crisis at one point or another. Do yourself (3) favors:
1. Start focusing on your desires and how you can attract what you want from your beliefs. Remember, positive affirmations spoken come to life when you FEEL GOOD!
2. Follow me on Social media for Daily Inspiration and Support! (Social Media)
The free positive mindset support will get you started towards your healing until you’re ready to work with me one-on-one.
3. Make a point to read my Journals! They will offer tips and guidance towards touchy, relatable topics followed up with encouragement!
Doing these three things will really help you get primed for our work. When you’re ready, call me and we’ll get you started. (I’m in no rush and will be here when you need me.) There are other types of personalities I absolutely won't work with. The whiner, the chronic skeptic, or individuals who consistently make excuses for not doing the work needed to see the results desired. If you are one of these people, I gently and respectfully ask that you not reach out until you are ready. Alignment is key and I want us both to feel connected. That's fair for all of us right?! I'm after success stories and committing to your growth means you are READY!!
